She's so gone
by The First Architect
Summary: What is the saying? You don't know what you have until it's gone? Yeah, well, Mark Reynolds hates that saying.
1. Maddy Shannon

__**A/N:** So I told myself I wouldn't write something for _Terra Nova_ because I wasn't sure if it has that much of a future (I hope I'm wrong. I really do) left. But curse Maddy Shannon and Mark Reynolds and their damn near adorable romance. Blame it on them that this has been created. And if any of you know me, I love putting men in emotionally compromising situations, because it's nice to see the strong man break down ever once and a while over their girl. So, be warned, there is **_violence_**, **_blood_**, **_mild language_**, and **_intense (intense) situations of peril_**.

* * *

><p><em>She's so gone<em>

* * *

><p><em>Part One:<em>

"_Where have all the good men gone?"_

* * *

><p>If anything, Maddy Shannon is a survivor.<p>

She survived 2149. Not well, admittedly. She still remembers what being invisible felt like. What walking through the halls of her school with no one knowing who she was. And she probably still carries scars from when she got sick. Damn rebreathers. But it's nothing that she can't learn from. And that what she's doing in Terra Nova. She's learning from her past and creating a whole new future for herself.

A future that is free of smog-filled skies and rebreathers.

And you know what?

Maddy can deal with anything Terra Nova wants to throw at her.

Because she's a survivor.

She thinks that's a pretty easy way to view her new life. To say that nothing is going to beat her and that she can and will become stronger. But she should have known it wasn't going to be easy.

Terra Nova was going to test her newfound determination. Sooner or later.

And one sunny Saturday afternoon, Maddy Shannon's newfound life goes straight to hell.

**.**

**.**

**.**

She is in the house playing checkers with Zoe when it happens. Her father is off following Taylor and Wash around doing 'security business'. Her mother is at the clinic, helping (to her father's immense dislike) Malcolm with research. And Josh? Well, he's probably getting into trouble with Skye somewhere OTG.

So really, Maddy has settled into her role of protective older sister rather forcefully. Don't get her wrong, she loves her little sister to death. But if she wanted to have a kid, she would have gone the rebellious/angry/spiteful teenage daughter rout. And she is far from that.

Still, it doesn't come without its perks. Mark Reynolds always knows where she is and seems to stop by on a regular basis to help with Zoe and keep her company.

Her smile at the thought of Mark is wiped from her face as a boom radiates from the distance. At first, she doesn't pay it much mind. Trees fall all the time in Terra Nova. It's the cost that comes with expansion.

"Maddy, it's your turn!" Zoe informs her rather anxiously. The youngest Shannon is on her way to winning and doesn't seem to like the fact that Maddy is stalling the inevitable.

Maddy rolls her eyes and moves one of her black board pieces absentmindedly. Which causes Zoe to squeal in delight as she quickly moves one of her red pieces to jump over Maddy's recent move.

Another boom sounds and this time Maddy looks up from the game.

Because it no longer sounds like tress falling.

"Maddy, you aren't even paying attention." Zoe complains.

"Be quiet for a second." Maddy replies, waving a hand and getting to her feet.

It is as if the rumble is coming from underground, but it's getting closer. And louder. And soon Maddy fully understands what is crashing towards them.

The explosions cause her body to lock up for a moment. She's not one who deals with fear easily. She tends to either jump or freeze, and today it looks like she's in the freezing type of mood.

Another explosion booms and the house rocks dangerously. Maddy can suddenly hear the screams and frantic cries from the Terra Novians outside and finally, after what seems like forever, her body responds. The hairs on the back of her neck stand on end just seconds before she grabs for her sister and pushes her to the floor.

Another explosion, this one seems to be right on top of them, knocks her off her feet and she lands hard on top of Zoe.

Then, everything seems to happen at once.

Sounds of twisting metal and snapping wood assaults her ears, but that is soon drowned out by a high pitched, constant tone. She can't hear anything because of the ringing in her ears. The something heavy crashes onto her back. Out of pure reflex and with all of her might Maddy forces her palms and knees into the floor and pushes upwards.

She will protect Zoe.

Even if it's the last thing she ever does.

After two more minutes of explosions, screams and falling debris, silence settles over Terra Nova.

With great effort, Maddy Shannon opens her eyes and looks down into the wide and frantic eyes of her younger sister. Who is, to her immense relief, unhurt. The two are almost completely shrouded in darkness, and Maddy can surmise, based on the crushing weight against her back, that they are buried under what was once their house. A stream of light cut's through the blackness as debris shifts and falls across Zoe's face.

Zoe licks her lips and blinks repeatedly, eyes adjusting. Slowly, she scans around them and offers a small, "Maddy? What's going on?"

Maddy's heart breaks. She hates seeing her sister like this. But when she tries to move to offer comfort, her limbs don't respond. They are heavy and stiff. Which makes sense because she's holding up what was once her house.

She's read about adrenaline and what it can do to someone in a dire situation, but never thought she'd actually have a personal experience. It kind of scares her. Don't get her wrong, she's thankful for the extra strength and focus, but she's scared because she doesn't know how long it'll last. And what terrifies her even more is what's going to happen when the adrenaline does run out. Because it will.

Slowly, she feels something hot and wet run down her face. The liquid hangs on her chin for a second before dropping to the ground next to Zoe's head.

It's dark red and thick.

And just like that, Maddy's mind snaps into clarity.

She tries to comfort her sister. But the words refuse to come. And instead, she releases a low, pained, choking gasp. She turns her head and coughs harshly, blood staining her lips. A groan sounds above them and Maddy freezes. She tastes salt and feels her stomach roll violently, but refuses to move. She's managed to create a kind of sort of protective space around them, but she doesn't know how sturdy it is.

It feels like she can't do anything but stare down at Zoe and offer comfort through her eyes. But that isn't enough for her little sister. Maddy watches as the curiosity in her sister's eyes turns to panic and the youngest Shannon starts to squirm under her.

Tears sting Maddy's eyes. Maybe one or two make their way down her cheeks, mixing with blood and dirt. "Zoe," she manages to croak out. Her sister freezes and looks up to her. "Zoe," she begins again, trying to force saliva instead of coppery blood down her aching throat. "Zoe, you have to stay calm. Can you do that for me?"

Zoe stares up at her for what seems like forever, eyes flicking back and forth with the cogs and wheels in her little head turning. But she nods none the less.

Maddy forces a smile. "That's my girl." She tries to lift her head and look around, but something heavy is resting across her shoulders and all she can manage is a quick glance before she has to drop her head. She doesn't try moving her legs; she can't feel anything besides her aching arms. It amazes her that such little effort can cause her to pant, but breathing is suddenly getting very, very difficult for her. She tries to take a deep breath, tries to calm her racing heart and get oxygen into her lungs, but something pushes against her left side when her stomach expands, and there is sudden, agonizing pain.

Her vision turns a sharp white for a second and her elbows nearly buckle. But through the agony her mind yells at her to hold strong. And she does. Because Zoe is under her and there is no way in hell she's giving up while her sister is still there.

"Maddy?" Zoe's voice is small and soft, like she's afraid that speaking to loud will shift the debris above them. "Are you okay?"

She honestly thinks about telling her little sister the truth. But that is a split second though that she squashes almost immediately. Maddy Shannon decides that in that moment, this situation is not hopeless. She swears to god, or whoever it is up there, that she is going to get her little sister out of this mess.

She's not going to just lay down and die because the situation is less than survivable. She's going to find a way out. And that is the Terra Nova Maddy Shannon. Not the 2149 Maddy Shannon. That Maddy would have died a long time ago.

Still, she avoids her sister's question. Because the more she thinks about it, the more the pain infests her mind. "Okay Zoe," she speaks quickly, because there's a dizziness that is eating away at the edges of her vision that is starting to scare her. "Can you see any way for you to get out? Start at where the light is. Is the hole big enough for you to get through?"

Zoe processes what she has asked and then looks towards the light, eyes squinting. She rolls to her left side and crawls past Maddy's left arm. The youngest Shannon pauses slightly and looks back to her sister. "Maddy," her voice is small. "There's blood on your arm."

Maddy forces yet another smile and tries to control the shaking of her arms. "Don't worry about me Zo, just tell me if you can get out."

Deep down Maddy knows Zoe doesn't believe her. Her little sister is smart enough to know when something's wrong. But Maddy also knows that Zoe will listen to her. Zoe knows now is not the time to argue.

Zoe crawls forward until Maddy can only see her feet without turning her head. After seconds of tense silence, Zoe says, "We can get out. There's room!"

Maddy lets out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding in. A small amount of blood runs over her lips, but she spits it out before Zoe can see. She hadn't missed the use of 'we' in her sister's sentence. And she now knows that she's going to have to convince Zoe to leave.

Suddenly there are small hands on either side of her face and she opens her eyes. She doesn't even remember closing them.

Zoe is staring at her, eyebrows slanted in five-year-old concern. "We can leave now." She says simply.

But it's not that simple.

Maddy shakes her head and tries to hold back tears. Because however strong she says she is, this is something that isn't easily done. Being alone is one of her most prominent fears. But now is not the time to let that fear rule her. If her sister has a chance to get out, then she'll be dammed if she hinders that escape.

"I need you to find Mom and Dad," she grinds out because the wave of pain that crashes through her threatens to steal her voice. "Find Mom and Dad," she says again. "Tell them what happened. Where I am. Do you think you can do that?"

Zoe looks from the hole, then back to Maddy, then back to the hole, then finally back to Maddy and shakes her head vigorously. Squeezing her eyes shut, she lets out a small, "No!" with the realization that she's going to have to leave her older sister behind.

"Zoe," Maddy pleads. "You have to do this. Be strong."

Zoe swallows and peaks one eye open. "But what about you?"

Maddy offers her last smile, but it barley reaches her eyes and turns into a grimace almost instantly. "I'll be fine." She lies. "Just as long as you get to Mom and Dad and tell them where I am." She swallows back the blood and locks eyes with her sister. "You're the only one that can do this Zoe."

They stare at each other for what seems like a lifetime, but then Zoe is wiping at her eyes with the back of her sleeve and nodding vigorously. She leans forward and wraps her small arms around Maddy's neck. Maddy tries not to move, but she's just so damn tired and emotionally wrecked that her left elbow caves with a sickening _pop_. Her side slams into something solid and sharp and a gasp escapes her mouth in a rush of air.

Zoe screams as the groaning of metal sounds above them and cowers under her, squeezing her eyes shut.

"Zoe!" Maddy grunts, right arm shaking with the strain of holding up the debris above them. "Go! Get out!"

Zoe, out of pure instinct and self preservation, begins to craw away.

The metal and wood above them groans and screeches and Maddy realizes that this is it. But if she can hold on for just a little bit longer, maybe Zoe can get out. "Zoe go!—Go!—Go!—_Go!_"

She focuses on the noises coming from her sister and it is only when they fade away that Maddy finally gives in. Her right arm collapses with a smaller _pop_ and she sinks to the hard floor seconds before the debris above her follows. It is a small drop, but still painful all the same.

The shift of the metal has cut out the light and Maddy is once again shrouded in darkness.

And there is pain.

Dear God is there pain.

So much so that she is thrown into unconsciousness the moment she hits the floor. A deep and dark blackness that consumes her is a split second. But it doesn't last. No. That'd be too easy.

She fades in an out of consciousness, pain coursing through her body beyond description. There is a moment when she is cursed with crystal clear clarity. A moment (she laughs because it feels like an eternity) where she can feel _everything_.

There is something sharp and cold pressing against her left side. Probably some sort of metal beam by the feel of it. There is something else lying across her shoulders that is making it extremely difficult to breath.

But not being able to breathe is not a foreign feeling to her. She remembers a time (when was it, exactly?) when her rebreather hadn't filtered properly for god knows how long. She remembers falling unconscious into her mother's arms seconds after choking on her own blood. She remembers beeping and hospitals and far off voices with encouraging words.

And the helplessness that comes with being confined to a hospital bed.

But the one thing she remembers the most about that time in her life was her vow to never let it happen again. She said she'd never be helpless again, because she had survived the number one thing that killed people in 2149.

Remembering way back when feeds what little adrenaline she has left. And she is suddenly determined to get herself out of this. She tries to move an arm just to see if it's still attached, but the complete and utter agony that follows the movement sends her straight into darkness.

And she's out like a light.

**.**

**.**

**.**

Her heavy eyelids drag open and she is presented with darkness and the coppery taste of blood.

A thought drifts into her head like a dream, telling her that something terrible has happened. But it's like trying to catch smoke with her bare hands. She can't quite figure out what's going on.

She senses something amiss, a sudden ominous stirring deep within her bones. Pressure builds up around her chest as if she were sinking into cold, deep water, constricting her throat and making it difficult to breathe.

She lets out a gasp and the air is forced from her lungs in an explosive exhale, as if someone has planted a foot on her back and pressed down hard. Her following inhale is small and there's a rattling in her lungs that renews her fear and desperation.

She finds it quite ridiculous that her family flashes before her eyes. She never had believed in that old 21st century saying. But yet, apparently it's true. Maybe not so much as a physical brain reaction per se, but something linked to heightened emotions in the face of death.

Because she does not want to leave her family behind with the memory of what she could have been.

That would destroy them.

Her mother would collapse in upon herself. Maddy remembers her mother's desperation when she had gotten sick. One of the best trauma surgeons in Chicago and Elisabeth Shannon was unable to prevent her eldest daughter from the palmyra plasia illness.

And her father? Well, Jim Shannon would look at Zoe every day and see Maddy's eyes, because they both have their mothers' eyes. She hadn't spent much time with her father as of late, but she doesn't have to. They have a connection that only a father and a teenage daughter have. They have the trust. And the love. And the acceptance. They have an understanding of each other that only comes with the growing experiences from her teenage years. She can talk to her mother four hours at a time about the most ridiculous things, but she would definitely consider herself a Daddy's girl at heart.

Josh would handle things like their mother, because no matter how much he'd deny it, living with three women after their father was sent to jail had an effect on him. Not to say that he was feminine by any means, just that he was more_...in touch_ with his emotions. And he would shut down completely. He doesn't act it, but he is extremely protective of her. Leaving Kara behind just about destroyed him. She knows he is loyal to the end, and Maddy dying would prove, yet again, that he was unable to protect someone he loved.

And then she thinks of Mark.

She thinks of his eyes. The gateways to his soul. And she smiles in the darkness because every time Mark smiles at her, his eyes sparkle like the clear blue sky and they honestly make her knees weak. It is love she sees. Maybe it's not the kind of love that her mother and father share, but it is love all the same. And it kills her that they will never get the chance to share something past adolescent longing.

She thinks of his smile and the way it had dragged her into him. That little sideways grin he flashes when he's amused. Like the first time she ever talked to him and rambled like an idiot. He didn't turn away from her. He grinned like he thought she was the most adorable thing he'd ever seen this side of the rift. And she knew that in that moment, he was the one she wanted.

She thinks of his goofball moments of being ridiculously polite (apologizing for pushing her up the tree after they went OTG) and his 18th century ideas of courtship. (Honestly, who asks father's permission anymore?)

She thinks about all of the time they spent together.

And about all of the time they _won't_ get to spend together.

In the last few moments of consciousness that she feels slipping away from her, Maddy Shannon finds it quite ridiculous that even though she's strived to be an entirely different person in Terra Nova, she's still going to die alone.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** So, what'd you think? Good? Okay? Or just plain horrible? Haha...but seriously...tell me what you think.


	2. Mark Reynolds

**A/N:** Thank you guys for all the love! It really means a lot :) And as for the lenght of this story, I think one more chapter will finish this little three-shot. So as always, read and review if you would like. But be warned, there is_ **_violence_**, **_blood_**, **_mild language_**, and **_intense (intense) situations of peril_**._

* * *

><p><em>She's so gone<em>

* * *

><p><em>Part Two:<em>

"_Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?"_

* * *

><p>Mark Reynolds prided himself on being a soldier. There is an unrivaled comradely that comes with serving in the line of fire with your fellow man (and woman in Wash's case). Soldiers are close nit and, to use the 21st century saying, really are like a band of brothers.<p>

And Mark thought that he had everything he ever wanted when he came to Terra Nova on the fifth pilgrimage. He was part of security, something he loved doing, and was surrounded by men and women who respected him. He was going to be a part of the new world, with all of the perks and glory that came with it.

But then he saw Maddy Shannon arrive on the tenth pilgrimage and knew his life would never be the same again.

Honestly, he doesn't know how he has survived this long without her.

There was just something about her that drew him in like the moon orbiting the earth. It's weird, he's never pictured himself settling down or being a family man. All he's ever known was how to be a soldier and protect people. Yet, he thinks that's why he was so drawn to Maddy.

Because from the moment he saw her, all he could think about was settling down with her and living a normal life. He can't help smiling whenever he thinks about her.

She is beautiful—Not your garden-variety pretty girl, or your movie-star kind of beautiful. She wasn't the billionaire bimbos he'd seen and sometimes protected back in 2144.

She is the sort of beautiful Troy had gone to war over.

(Yes, he has read the Iliad, try not to faint)

High cute cheekbones that showed adorable dimples when she smiled. A delicate, rounded chin. Absolutely unblemished tan skin. Long-lashed deep chocolate eyes, thin curved eyebrows. Long, gorgeous, brown hair that he would kill to run his hands through. Tuck a few stray locks behind her ear. See. _See_ what she does to him?

But it isn't so much the looks that had done him in. It was her personality. Because she had no idea how beautiful she was to him. He knows that because every time he is around her, she'll ramble off facts about Terra Nova and he'll just grin at her, because his mere presence makes her nervous and giddy as a schoolgirl. And he makes her nervous because she cares so much. And he thinks that's the type of girl he's always been attracted to. The one's who don't think they're beautiful. Because really, they've never had the perks of what being beautiful and popular bring. So when they find someone who truly loves them, they'll love them back unconditionally.

Yeah, he'd been caught up in her the moment he saw her. Which kind of makes him upset because he's a soldier. Things like puppy love shouldn't affect him. But damn Maddy Shannon for making him feel this way.

After meeting her, listening to her ramble about Brachiosauri and their eating patterns, he knew she was going to be a problem for him. Because he thought it was quite possibly the most adorable thing he's ever seen. So he swore to himself that he would stay away from her. But it seemed that he could no more stay away from her than he could stop breathing. For the first time in years—probably since coming to Terra Nova—something else had suddenly become as important to him as being a soldier under Commander Taylor.

And that something, whether he saw it coming or not, was Maddy Shannon.

**.**

**.**

**.**

It is a sunny Saturday afternoon when he finally takes the time to contemplate his feelings for the eldest Shannon daughter. About how his heart rate thumps like a damn hummingbird whenever he's around her. About how he becomes a nervous wreck and ignores his mouth-mind filter and says whatever he's feeling. Honestly, if he keeps it up, she's going to think he's secretly a woman based on what he tells her.

"No, you're _perfect_," he mocks to himself, sticking out his tongue and making a face. "God, Reynolds, could you have been any more damn cliché?"

But his self-hate only lasts for a second.

It is the far off sound of an explosion that rocks Maddy Shannon's face from his mind. Out of pure instinct his head snaps up and his eyes scan the horizon. And then he spots it. There, marring the sky just off towards agriculture, is a mushroom cloud full of smoke and orange red flames.

There is a moment where Corporal Mark Reynolds mind goes blank.

But then another explosion splits through the air and the ground beneath his feet threatens to send him sprawling. Screams accompany another explosion that hits closer to him and he is thrown full into reality.

Someone is yelling his name, but he can't make out the voice through the explosions and increasing hysterical screams. He turns slowly, as if in a dream, and finds Lt. Washington standing next to Commander Taylor in his office.

She's waving at him, eyes hard and frenzied. _"Help the civilians!"_ She yells. _"Help them—!"_

Then Taylor is yelling at her and diving away. Mark watches as she snaps her head up, sees something that turns her eyes wide, and then she's vaulting over the safety bar and dropping two storys to the ground.

Before he can take a step towards his commanding officer, something smashes through Taylor's office (he's going to be _pissed_) and the explosion that follows knocks him from his feet.

There is a moment where all Mark can do is stare up at the smoke riddled sky and try to remember how to breathe. Finally he rolls to his side when he can feel his limbs and coughs harshly into the dirt. Staggering to his feet, he looks around and can only describe the events unfolding before his eyes as pure panic.

Terrifying chaos.

And then Mark sees her.

Through the panic-stricken crowd that is now infesting the main area of Terra Nova, Mark watches as Zoe Shannon emerges from behind the probe statue and looks around frantically.

"Reynolds!" Wash's hand is suddenly on his shoulder and he has to force himself away from the youngest Shannon. "Reynolds, don't just stand—"

He clenches his jaw as he spies Zoe out of the corner of his eye scamper away from the area. Wash follows his gaze and finds the tail end of the Zoe's escape and understands instantly.

"Reynolds," she says, voice hard. "Go check on the Shannon home."

Mark snaps his eyes to his commanding officer. "Ma'am. People need help here."

"Jim Shannon is head of our security," she snaps with authority. "We need to know if his family is safe."

"Lieutenant…" he begins, because just because he's in a relationship with Maddy Shannon doesn't give him the right to abandon his duties. No matter how much he wants to.

Lieutenant Alice Washington grabs the collar of his shirt. "Go look for Maddy." She shoves him away, dark eyes deep in understanding. "That's an order Mark!"

He blinks in surprise but hardens his eyes moments later. "Yes Ma'am," he answers with a curt nod. And then he is turning tail and sprinting as fast as he can towards the Shannon home. If he remembers correctly, and he does, it is about a click from his current position.

But so help him he will get there in five minutes because his heart is hammering against his chest in dread. He's passing too many destroyed and broken houses to feed his optimism. And there is fear crawling its way up his spine. Because he is afraid of what—

He turns the corner and his knees nearly gives out on him.

Because half of the Shannon house is gone.

Just—_gone._

He hasn't cried—really cried—in over a decade, but the sight in front of him nearly breaks down those walls. Nearly.

He scans around the broken house in a frenzy, searching for any sign of someone escaping. And there, in the dirt leading away from a pile of broke roof and twisted walls, are tiny footprints. And in that instant he knows Maddy is buried underneath all of that shit.

Don't ask him how he knows.

He just does.

Because he's always been drawn to her.

And he is shooting forward and dragging a metal beam from the pile. Then ripping a piece of wall away. "Maddy!" he roars as his course hands find another piece of splintered wood. _"Maddy!"_

He shoves another wooden beam away and freezes.

Because the hand that he sees sticking out from under the pile of debris is strikingly familiar. And the bracelet on the wrist sends his heart twisting in his chest with painful force.

He remembers making Maddy that bracelet one day when he had tower duty. He'd told her about the sister he had to leave back in 2144 and how she had taught him how to braid because their parents were hardly ever home. The bracelet was made from three different grasses, and the way they were twined together forms the strongest rope known to Terra Nova.

He told her it would never break.

"…Maddy…" he whispers, voice suddenly caught in his throat.

And it is only when one of her fingers twitches ever so slightly that the optimisms that never really goes away flares its head.

With cut and bleeding hands he continues to rip pieces of her house off of her. And when he finally manages to remove most of the debris covering her head and shoulders, his breath leaves him in a rush of air.

Because Maddy Shannon is looking up at him with half-lidded, hazy eyes.

He panics slightly when she just stares at him, like she has no idea who he is. The left side of her face is covered in blood from a gash in her hairline. And her shirt is ripped and small cuts are scattered across her back and shoulders. But what frightens him the most is her gaze. It's distant, weak, and unfocused.

He wipes his bleeding hands on his shirt and places a palm on the side of her head, thumb stroking her cheek lightly. "Maddy," he tests his voice, and it is a mere squeak compared to what he is used to. So he swallows back the saliva and tries again. Because he cannot sound scared in front of her. "Maddy, do you know who I am?"

Her mouth opens like she wants to say something, but all she does is lick her lips and spit out blood. She flicks her eyes up towards him moments later and rolls them, letting a small smile slip across her face, "Don't be…an idiot."

He laughs, but it's more of a crying laughter because before he knows it, there is wetness on his cheeks. "I'm going to get you out, okay?" he promises sternly. "I'm going to get you to your Mom. She'll be able to help."

Maddy blinks at him for a couple of moments, confusion and worry and about twelve other emotions flashing through her eyes, before she finally nods her head and relaxes.

Mark surveys the situation. There is a ceiling beam that has embedded itself into the floor near her left side. And that wouldn't mean anything if there wasn't blood on it. But the red liquid is staining the metal. He leans forward and dips his head under another beam and just about loses his mind. Because there, marring the tan skin of her left side, is a deep gash bleeding freely.

With a clenched jaw he pulls and pushes broken wood and metal off of her until he's finally able to drag her out. And it is only when she is in his arms that he collapses to the ground with a world heavy sigh.

Maddy seems to sense his relief and sinks into his embrace, turning her cheek into his chest and letting out a deep sigh. But it cuts through her body like a knife and a coughing fit attacks her lungs seconds later. He holds her tight and watches as a small dribble of blood runs from the corner of her mouth.

"Maddy." He places his hand on the side of her face. "Maddy, look at me." She blinks slowly and focuses on him weakly. "Try to stay focused," he instructs her. "Focus on the pain if you have too. Just stay with me."

"Focus," she mumbles. "Gotch ya."

"Good." He says, eyes scanning over her. He has to do a general consensus of her injuries to see if it's safe to move her. "Maddy," he uses her name to keep her focused and to reassure himself that she's still with him. And he thanks God for that. "Can you feel your legs? And if you can, can you move them?"

She looks at him and furrows her eyebrows and he can tell that she thinks it's a stupid question. But there is a moment of frightening silence when she doesn't move at all. She's staring intently at her feet and then she lets out a hiss of pain. But then her right foot moves. And then the left one twitches. And Mark can finally breathe.

"It hurts to," she slurs. "But I can…move them."

"That's good," he answers. Nodding his head he turns his attention to her bleeding side. Hesitantly, he lifts away her bloodied shirt. She releases a low hiss of pain that he tries to ignore the best he can and inspects the wound. It's deep and shows no sign of stopping.

Mark Reynolds, in that moment, gathers Maddy Shannon up into his arms and lifts with his legs. She's surprisingly light and seems to fit perfectly against him. And she doesn't complain when he lifts her off the ground, just rolls her head against his chest and closes her eyes.

"No way," he says sternly. "There's no way I'm going to let you do that. Keep your eyes open, Maddy."

She shakes her head. "Too tired," she slurs.

He tightens his hold on her. "Tell me something," he says suddenly, because he needs her to stay awake. Because if she's awake, she's alive and with him.

"What?" Her voice is so soft he has to strain to hear her.

He takes a step to test her traveling ability and just like he though, the jarring motion makes her whimper. He clenches his jaw. Because he's going to run to the clinic. And she's not going to like it.

"Tell me anything," he says. "Tell me something random. Something about plants. Or the moon. Or the dino's here. Just," he looks down to her. "Something."

"You're so demanding," she rasps, shaking her head. But she seems to understand his need for her to stay awake, because she starts rattling off facts moments later.

With Maddy Shannon's voice as his soundtrack, Mark Reynolds takes a deep breath and sprints towards the Terra Nova clinic.

**.**

**.**

**.**

He bursts into the clinic ten minutes later (which is saying something considering the Shannon house was two miles from the clinic and he was carrying someone), chest tight and legs feeling like jello. His heart a hummingbird in his chest.

"Help!" he pants, nearly stumbling forward. "_Somebody help!_"

He doesn't remember collapsing to his knees, but when he opens his eyes next he is extremely close to the floor. Maddy is still in his arms, but he can just barely hear her spurt off her random facts. There more mumbled words than anything else.

Then there are hands on his face and he blinks up through his exhaustion.

"Mark," the voice says. "Mark, It's Doctor Shannon. You're going to have to let go of Maddy."

He nods his head, but the action is exaggerated and sloppy and he can't focus. He's just so damn _tired_ all of a sudden.

But he's not tired enough to not notice that the weight in his arms is gone, and the thought of not knowing where Maddy is snaps him mind to attention like a punch to the gut. He looks up and finds that again, he is surrounded by chaos.

The lobby of the clinic and the clinic itself was not damaged in the attack, but almost all of the beds are taken and he knows that they were extremely understaffed as it was. It shows now more than ever, with nurses having to rush back and forth between patients. And he thinks that really, Doctor Elisabeth Shannon is their only true trauma surgeon.

"_Maddy!" _

The sound of _her_ name snaps his head sideways and he finds Doctor Shannon leaning over a table. He gets to his feet without consciously making the decision to move and is at the tableside in an instant. There is a fog infecting his mind and his arms are becoming lethargic, but he shakes it out of his system.

Elisabeth Shannon has both of her hands on either side of her daughters face. "Maddy," the desperation in her voice is enough to snatch the air from Mark's lungs. "Sweety can you hear me? Come on, Maddy. Stay with us."

Mark looks frantically to Doctor Shannon, whose face is a mask of professionalism, except for her eyes, which are threatening tears. She is scanning and fussing with two nurses, telling them rather harshly to prep for surgery. They respond with curt nods and disappear to gather the equipment.

Mark grabs a hold of Maddy's hand and leans close to her ear, whispering words of reassurance and hope. His voice is tight and strained with transparent terror, but somehow, he gets through.

"…mom…?" Maddy whispers, opening her eyes a fraction of an inch.

Elisabeth Shannon lets out a chokes laugh and nods her head. "Yeah, baby. It's me."

But the smiles are washed away as Maddy lets out another wet cough and starts gasping and choking like a stranded fish.

With a curse Elisabeth Shannon tries to hold down her daughter and read the data pad all at the same time. "Damnit," she snaps. "Not again. God not again." She drags a digital image of Maddy's body up beside the bed and scans the transparent outline of muscle, bones, and tissues with frantic hands. She catalogues injuries and blows up each of her daughter's major organs to see if any are damaged.

"Again?" Mark questions, voice boarding hysteria. "What do you mean, _again?_"

But he doesn't get an answer. Because he glances briefly to the screen that is showing Maddy's lungs and has to do a double-take. Now, Mark Reynolds is no doctor, but he's taken entry level courses on human anatomy and whatnot. It is standard to being a soldier. So he knows for a fact that when he see's Maddy's lungs blow up on the digital scanner, they are not supposed to look so…_scarred. _He understands that she's taken damage today, but his girlfriend's lungs look like they've been through hell _before_ all of this.

"There's fluid in her right lung. And her left is collapsed." The Shannon matriarch is speaking to the nurse who has materialized beside her, but he can barely hear her. There's suddenly an ocean raging in his head.

Mark swallows visibly and glances in desperation to Maddy. The veins in her neck are raised and he now knows it's because the strain of just trying to _breathe_ causes her agony.

"We're going to need to inflate the left lung, but we need to close the laceration on her left side and get the internal and external bleeding under control first." Elisabeth Shannon flings the lungs on the data screen away and pulls up a full body scan. "Minor injuries consist of ribs eight, nine and ten broken on the left side. Both patellae are fractured and she's torn her left tricep clean through and her right partially." There is a moment of pause and Doctor Shannon turns to look at him with sharp, questioning eyes. "What in God's name happened, Mark?"

_Well, your house fell on her_ is what he wants to say, but something tells him those are not smart words. And he'd really like to answer that question because he knows not to get in between a mother and her injured daughter, but he catches the sound of distant gunfire and the hairs on his neck start to stand on end. He's very much an instincts soldier. He's learned to trust them almost religiously. So he ignores Doctor Shannon and takes a stride towards the clinic front door—

—Mira, in all her exotic frenzied glory, bursts through seconds later, Sixers pouring into the clinic guns raised. A wounded soldier to Mark's left who's being treated shoots to his feet and grabs for his gun. But Mira, with a twitch of her trigger finger, has him on the floor grabbing his now wounded leg, gun discarded—but not entirely useless.

Because the weapon has skidded towards Mark in a rather coincidental fashion and rests just a few feet away.

But he is still caught in no-man's-land.

"_No one move!"_ Mira booms, resting her rifle on her shoulder. "If you just cooperate, we'll be out of your hair in no time." She lets a grin cross her lips. "Trust me."

Shot's ripple from outside and Mark clenches his teeth, not remembering when he had lifted his arms in surrender. He notices that Doctor Shannon and the nurses are rigid as well, as is everyone else in the clinic.

The small wheezing pants from Maddy flutter into his ear and he suddenly finds himself eyeing the gun on the floor to his right. With a quick glance, he finds Mira watching him like a hawk, and he almost swears that her eyes are telling him to not do it. Which is weird because isn't she supposed to be this hardcore rebellious leader that longs for the fight? But that's not what her eyes are saying right now.

Mark then looks to his left. He locks eyes with Doctor Shannon, who desperately wants to continue treating Maddy. He can tell because Elisabeth Shannon's hand has been inching towards her daughters digital data pad for the past 30 seconds.

And finally, he finds Maddy's eyes. They are almost closed, but she seems to sense the tense situation and her ever present curiousness has kept her conscious. Her breaths are shallow and even from his position he can hear the rattling in her lungs. She looks at him—and he means really _looks_ at him—like she's saying goodbye—and then all hell breaks loose.

She turns her head away and coughs violently, hands going straight to her still bleeding side. She squeezes her eyes shut in pain and the corners of her lips pull up in agony. There is a rapid beeping that fills the room as the EKG linked to Maddy runs haywire.

Suddenly, all of the guns sweep in one motion towards the sound and Mark is in front of Maddy and her mother with his hands raised in surrender in seconds. "Don't shoot!—Don't shoot!" he shouts quickly, eyes focused on the floor.

Behind him, Elisabeth Shannon throws caution out the window and turns to her daughter, placing a hand on the digital pad and shouting orders to her two nurses. Mark watches out of the corner of his eye as a breathing mask is placed over Maddy's face and then turns back to the situation at hand.

"Please. She needs to be treated. She'll _die_ if she doesn't." Mark clenches his jaw, because the words are complete _mud_ in his mouth. "Please, just—just let them help her."

There is sudden—_absolute_—silence.

"What's your name?" Mira asks moment later, voice somehow relaxed and unfazed by the hostile situation.

"Reynolds," he replies, eyes still downcast. "Mark Reynolds." If he has learned anything from being a soldier, it is that you do not question who's in charge. You do not look your commanding officer, or your enemy in the eyes. That is a challenge. And he does not want that right now.

"Look at me," she says and he hesitantly obliges her.

It is strange, lifting his head to look at her. There's just something about Mira that has made him curious ever since the first time he had heard about her. And really, it's because she seems, in this sort of twisted way, an actual _good_ leader. Almost all of the hostility towards Terra Nova is because of food or, in this specific raid, medical supplies. So really, Mira is just looking out for her people. But why do Terra Novians have to pay with blood for her to get her way?

"Well, Reynolds, Mark Reynolds," there is a smile on her lips that he cannot place. It's like she's remembering something from long ago. "Do you know the difference between a soldier and a man?"

"No, ma'am, I don't."

He figures it wouldn't hurt their situation if he was polite.

"The difference is that a soldier would have gone for the gun just then, throwing consequence to the wind." And then her smile seems to shift on him. Something like pride slips into the corners of her lips. "But a man?" the Sixer leader continues, "He would have moved to protect the people he loved." She watches the last of her men carry a bin of antibiotics out the front door and then returns her attention to him. "You made the right choice, Reynolds. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise."

And with that she vanishes out the door.

Mark can hear the start of engines and enhanced gunfire, but he figures they'll get out of Terra Nova rather easily. One of the bombs earlier had hit one of their generators that supplied power to the front gate.

Securing the Sixers a safe exit.

But that's not important right now. He'll deal with the Sixers and the raid later.

There is this awkward moment when no one is moving except for Doctor Shannon and the two nurses helping her. It's like people can't process that Mira was just in and out in under two minutes and no one was killed.

He blinks and swallows, and his eardrums pop with the released pressure and he can hear _everything_.

Turning sharply, he returns to his position next to Maddy's bed. But he's forced to take a step away so the nurses can work without being disrupted.

He realizes that Doctor Shannon is surprising sufficient even when she is working on her own daughter. But he figures she has an extra drive to succeed in her work when it's someone she loves. He watches Doctor Shannon and the nurses as if in a fog. It is only when a nurse cut's a small hole in Maddy's side just under her left armpit and then sticks a long tube into the hole (which turns red with blood sickeningly fast) that he is hit with a wave of dizziness that almost sends him to the floor.

And as Mark Reynolds stands there and watches Maddy Shannon fight for her life, he wonders if becoming a soldier in Terra Nova was even worth it.

Because who is he if he can't even protect the girl he loves?

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Angsty stuff right there, isn't there? Anyways, tell me what you guys think! And just for some information, I really haven't seen enough of Mira to get her down (but that's saying I have all of the other characters down and that would be a lie lol) But I figure she's not your average 'bad girl leader'. I feel like she's being forced into her role, so I don't see her as a cutthroat villain. Hench her rather sage-like appearance in this story. But I could be totally wrong. Whatever.


	3. Mark Reynolds 2

**A/N: **So it's been *nervous laugh* a while, hasn't it? Well, I blame myself and bad planning. I shouldn't have started this story right before finals. Silly me and thinking I could actually have a life outside of the library. But anyways, we're winding down in this chapter. Lots of back story and bonding time between Mark and other characters. And Elisabeth talking about when Maddy was sick is from one of the psychiatric evaluation videos. That's not mine. But it was never used during the show, so why not use it here?

* * *

><p><em>She's so gone<em>

* * *

><p><em>Part Three:<em>

_Mark Reynolds (2)_

"_He's gotta be strong, he's gotta be fast and he's gotta be fresh from the fight."_

* * *

><p>He'd like to say that he is used to this. However sad that sounds. He'd like to say that as a soldier, he has seen his fair share of blood and death. And that's somewhat true. He has walked next to death and washed blood off of his hands many (<em>many<em>) times.

But the blood and death had never—ever—come close to touching someone he loved. And until now, Mark Reynolds had considered himself to be a very lucky man.

Unfortunately, luck has an odd way of running out right when you need it the most.

If there was ever a truer statement. Mark glances down to his fresh new shirt and raw hands. He'd scrubbed them for god knows how long. Anything to get off…Maddy's blood.

The room he is in is small and softly lit. Head bowed slightly, he clings to her hand for all he's worth and listens to the beating of her heart on the EKG monitor. It's soft and steady and he swears it's the best thing he's ever heard. Because it means that Maddy Shannon is still here, with them.

Mark lets out a shaky breath and lets go of her hand, leaning back in his chair. He rubs a tired hand over his face and looks up to the ceiling. Then the helplessness sets in. And the guilt.

Because a waiting man's worst enemy is silence.

And the exhausting events of the past couple of hours flash through his mind with blinding force.

**.**

**.**

**.**

_2 hours earlier_

"_Elisabeth!" Jim Shannon bursts through the front doors of the clinic with a sobbing Zoe in his arms and Josh at his heels. The remaining three members of the Shannon family are disheveled, frenzied, and a little bloodied, but otherwise unhurt._

_Mark sighs inwardly, thankful for the little things. He doesn't know if Doctor Shannon could have handled working on another member of her family._

_Jim freezes suddenly, eyes growing so wide they might actually fall out of his face. And Mark isn't quite sure if the father is breathing._

_Doctor Shannon looks up briefly, locking eyes with her husband. A beat passes as she glances to her two children and then back to Jim. Her chin threatens to shake and she nearly breaks down right then and there, but she tightens her lips and blinks the tears away. With the smallest shake of her head she tells her husband not to bring Zoe any closer. This is not something the youngest Shannon needs to see. And Josh, well Mark doesn't think Josh is breathing either. The brother hasn't been able to look away from his sister's immobile form on the table._

_But then Jim is handing Zoe to Josh and striding forward. He slips one of his hands into one of Maddy's and places the other against the side of her head. He strokes her hair and tries to hold back his emotion. "What happened?" he asks, voice hoarse. The pure agony that flashes in Jim Shannon's blue eyes is so heart-wrenching March clenches his jaw against his trembling chin._

_Elisabeth shakes her head. "I don't know," she says, voice raw. "But whatever happened she's lucky to be alive, Jim."_

_And Mark understands her words to a frightening degree. Lucky is not scientific terminology. Lucky is exactly what it sounds like. It is fortunate. It is chance. And it means it could have easily gone the other way._

_Jim clenches his jaw and turns his head to the side._

_And Mark Reynolds shifts uncomfortably because Jim Shannon is staring right at him. He feels the father's eyes rake him over and knows (he hasn't actually looked at himself because he knows the blood on his clothes is not his. And that terrifies him) he doesn't look good. Just to prove him right, Jim is inches from him in seconds, blue eyes flashing with fury and fear._

"_What happened, Corporal?" he growls._

_The formality snaps Mark to attention and he straightens, folding his blood covered hands behind his back. "I was heading towards Commander Taylor's office when the Sixers struck, sir. Lieutenant Washington told me to go check on your home to see if your family was safe." He pauses and shifts uncomfortably. "When I got to your house it was—gone. I don't think it had been hit directly, but…" He trails off shaking his head and locks his jaw. What he says next is soft and raw in his throat because it's probably the most terrifying memory he will ever have. "I found Maddy buried underneath some debris. I got her here as fast as I could."_

_He keeps his eyes focused on the floor and shakes his head. He can feel it coming. The clench of his chest. The wetness gathering at the corners of his eyes. How it's almost impossible for him to breath. And then a tear rolls down his cheek. And another._

_It's not a hysterical, unkept cry. It's soft and quiet and he's just so damn tired and frustrated and helpless that he is just completely overwhelmed with everything that has happened. And you want to know the worst part? It's the guilt. It's suffocating him._

"_I'm sorry," he finds himself saying in a broken voice. "I'm sorry I couldn't…I should've…"_

_Jim Shannon's hand is on his shoulder and Mark can feel so much emotion through the touch—understanding. comfort. gratitude—that he nearly loses himself all over again. He turns his head and tries not to let the father of the girl he loves see him cry, but it's difficult to hide the tears because Jim is suddenly pulling him into a loose hug._

_And Mark, well, he didn't have a great childhood, okay? His mother left him and his Dad a year after his baby sister was born. So it was just the three of them and they didn't have a ton of money and were only able to just get by, but their Dad was always there for them and they were a family. A broken one, but a family all the same. But then, one day, their Dad…he just never came home after work. And from then on it was just Mark and Elena. Until he was recruited by Commander Taylor and Terra Nova and Elena was determined to get a high school and college education, even if the world was dying. She'd always told him she'd find a way to save the planet. He wonders if she's even close to finding a solution._

_So as the years passed, Mark started to forget what his father and sister looked like. But the one thing he will always remember, the one thing that is still one hundred percent crystal clear in his mind is that they loved him. And he keeps that close to his heart, because on the down days all he has to do is find that feeling—it is sharp and clear and _pure_—and he can get through anything._

_The kicker? Jim Shannon reminds him a lot of his father. Kind. Protective. Family oriented._

_And he is not afraid to admit that he misses his old man terribly._

_Especially now._

_Because what he does next is press his face into Jim Shannon's chest and cries. Later in life he'll think back on this moment and not be proud of his actions. This is something that is so completely _not_ him it's frightening. But then again, Maddy Shannon and her family make him do some crazy things._

_And right now, well it feels pretty damn good to just break down and cry and not be ashamed or embarrassed of it._

"_It's okay," Jim Shannon says quietly. And Mark can feel the older man shift his head back to look at his wife. Mark doesn't know what is exchanged, but the next words shift his tears of fear to ones of joy. "You did enough, Mark. You saved my daughter."_

**.**

**.**

**.**

"If you don't stop you'll re-open the cuts on your hands." Elisabeth Shannon's lightly accented voice cuts through him and his head snaps towards the door.

She's leaning against the frame, eyes watching him. There is this small tug at the corner of her lips and he can swear she's smiling at him. But it is too small for her to mean it fully. And he has never seen her look so _tired_ before. She tries to hide it, naturally, but he's become incredibly talented at reading people.

"Ma'am?" he manages to get out.

She grins at that. "Please," she waves a hand and enters the room. "Mrs. Shannon will do fine, Mark." She slips into the chair on the opposite side of Maddy's bed and tucks a foot underneath her. Nodding to him she says, "Let me see them."

He blinks and looks down to his palms. Small cuts and gashes fleck the skin of his hands from when he'd frantically ripped away the splintered wood and metal, but nothing too serious. They'd been cleaned appropriately.

He holds them up for the doctor anyways.

"They'll scar." Elisabeth nods her head, eyes scanning. "But they'll heal well."

Lowering his hands, he goes right back to clasping them together, holding tight. He almost laughs sadly. Because however proud men are of their scars, he knows Maddy will beat him in that category. And that shakes him to his core.

"You don't think they'll ever be clean again, right?" She asks him suddenly.

He looks up to her again. And _really_ looks. There is this sad sort of smile slipping across her lips and her eyes are full of pained understanding. Sadness. Guilt. Fear. Panic. Regret. He didn't think someone could feel so much at one time, but Doctor Shannon's eyes are incredibly readable. And he is instantly brought back to what she had said early about an '_again'_.

Mark doesn't think he's ever really spent time with Elisabeth Shannon. And it's weird because for a woman he knows so little about, he's surprisingly comfortable around her. Maybe it's because Maddy gets most of her looks from her mother. The two are strikingly familiar. He'd always been more comfortable around mothers than fathers, anyways. Mothers didn't generally try and kill him for talking to their daughters. So he figures Jim Shannon is going to be the hardest of the Shannon family to convince of his intentions.

"Do you think I could ask you something?" He says the question slowly, because what he is asking about is extremely personal and from a time the mother probably wants to forget. He's completely ready for her to tell him to mind his own damn business. And he'd be fine with that. Actually, he would probably prefer it. Something tells him that Maddy Shannon has fought for her life before. And that thought scares him.

Elisabeth Shannon regards him for a moment, eyeing him curiously. Finally, after a few tense seconds, she releases a breath and glances towards her daughters sleeping form. "I suppose so," she says in a sigh. "But I have a feeling I already know what it is."

She is not stupid. But he already knew that. "Earlier," he swallows and tries to be as nonchalant as possible. "When I first brought Maddy in, you said _'not again'_." He glances to her and she is looking directly at him and for some reason he cannot bring himself to finish the question.

He doesn't have to.

"You want to know what I meant by that?" She says and it is not a question but a statement.

He nods slowly and doesn't say anything.

Doctor Shannon glances to the floor and licks her lips. "Well about—," she brushes hair out of her eye in a gesture he has noticed means she's talking about something that deeply bothers her. "—About eight months ago, back in 2149, Maddy came home from school and she was coughing up blood." Her voice gets caught in her throat for a second, a split second, but he still notices it. "She had to be hospitalized," Elisabeth shakes her head and looks to the ground. "I was so scared…" Swallowing, she takes a moment to compose herself. "It turns out her rebreather hadn't been filtering properly," she rolls her eyes, "for God knows how long. And you know—you know that thing they say about frogs? How if you—put them in a frying pan and turn up the heat slowly enough they'll just stay there until they die." She looks at him now, disgust and desperation in her eyes. "Well that was me." She smiles sadly and looks to the floor. And he wonders if she's avoiding his eyes because she feels like she's let him down somehow, let him down because she couldn't prevent what happened to Maddy. "Yeah," she says slowly, eyes still downcast. "I hadn't realized how bad things had gotten until…"she trails off and shakes her head. "…until I was sitting by Maddy's bedside watching a machine…breath for her."

He swallows and can't seem to take a breath. His hand moves of its own accord and he finds himself grasping onto Maddy's warm hand for all he's worth. Because this girl lying in this bed is probably the strongest woman he will ever encounter (Wash comes a close second).

"We had to do psychological profiles before we were cleared to come here." Elisabeth looks to him. "The man interviewing me asked that if we were cleared, would we accept the recruitment offer. If I would have no reservations about leaving." She shrugs and smiles sadly. "I say that at least here, we have a fighting chance." She trails off and looks back to Maddy. "Here, we have a future."

"I envy you for being able to think that," he murmurs. "It's just," he shrugs and doesn't take his eyes off of Maddy's peaceful face. "Things like this—things like this make me question this place, you know?"

He doesn't look to Elisabeth Shannon. He can say what he thinks as long as he doesn't look at her. There's something about knowing that someone is watching you that censors your mind. The eye contact freezes your personal thoughts and numbs your tongue, pushing you towards what your observer wants to hear. And right now, he feels that he owes Doctor Shannon some sort of insight into what he's feeling. The striped version of Mark Reynolds. Because this situation—almost losing Maddy—it nearly killed him.

"This place isn't so bad," There is a hint of a smile to her lips and he sneaks a glance towards her. The next words that come out of her mouth, dear God do they almost bring tears to his eyes. "After all, Mark, it gave Maddy you."

Whatever creature that stole his breath away batter give it back in a second, because he needs to breathe. The words, well they freeze his lungs and make his eyes grow wide.

Elisabeth laughs softly and there is a small hit of sadness to it. "Maddy was always—gifted. She excelled in school in 2149. She was whip smart. Intelligent. I was so proud of her." She pauses and looks to Maddy's face, shaking her head. "But she never had any friends. _Real_ friends. She was alone." Doctor Shannon turns to him then, eyes dark. "She still had us, obviously, but," she shakes her head again. "It wasn't enough. She tried to hide the loneliness with fake smiles, but I could see right through them. Then we came here and, well, after the first day, I just knew something had changed." Elisabeth smiles, "I saw her right after she had talked to you, and she—she was _glowing_. I'd never seen her look that way before." The mother locks with his eyes, "So, thank you, Mark, for giving Maddy something I could not. Happiness."

"I'd imagine Helen of Troy looked something like your daughter," He says. He doesn't know why he says it. Or why _that_ fact would make remotely any sense to the mother. It's more of like a word vomit. Like how his brain-mouth censor doesn't seem to work anymore. But he is thankful that someone finally _gets it_. Get's that his feelings, they aren't some puppy dog love. They are real, true and the most certain thing he has been sure of in a long—_long_—time. "The first time I ever saw her, it was…" he shakes his head, "…Well, I don't know, it just seemed natural to be around her. Like we had waited our whole lives to finally meet. Like _fate_." He shudders at the ultra feminine word. "But yeah, like fate."

Elisabeth looks at him again, eyes scanning. Then the grin is twitching across her face, her eyes starting to get that little sparkle that Maddy's have. She seems to know that he was going to be something important to her daughter. Because the smile is twisted with a little edge of smugness. Bragging, maybe? An 'about-time-he-admitted-it-to-me-but-I-already-knew' smile. And Mark wonders that if the little sparkle he sees in Maddy's eyes is the same thing. That she knew he was it. That he was the one. And he wonders if his eyes betrayed him as well. Because the moment he met Maddy Shannon, he knew he'd say I do.

"Helen of Troy, the face that sunk a thousand ships?" Elisabeth says with a smile. "The Iliad, if I'm not mistaken, is one of the oldest known epic romance stories."

He lets out a laugh. She's poking fun at him.

Scratching the back of his head, he returns the smile. "It's also one of the first epic poems about war, Doctor Shannon. I had to read it in training."

She lets out a small disbelieving laugh and shakes her head. She looks to her daughter again, and Mark understands that she's checking if Maddy's chest is rising. Checking to see if she is still breathing.

Maddy will live. It's just the fact that she was almost gone. And if you almost lose something important, you will protect it and watch over it for all you're worth after you get it back.

Before Mark can say anything else, Jim Shannon is opening the door to the clinic room, eyes scanning. He enters, trailed by Josh and then Zoe, who seems somewhat hesitant. The youngest Shannon finds her sleeping sister and then diverts her eyes to the ground.

Mark knows guilt when he sees it. And the littlest Shannon has it written all over her face.

"How is she?" Jim asks.

Elisabeth smiles up to her husband and plants a kiss on his lips when he leans down to her. "Better," she sighs. "She's sleeping right now."

"Mark." Jim nods his head.

Mark gets to his feet and steps back so the father can sit down. "Sir."

Jim sits and motions to the end table next to Maddy's bed. "You want to put the flowers over there, Zoe?"

The youngest Shannon nods and walks slowly to the table, placing the glass vase on the top and looking quickly to her sister. She drops her eyes almost immediately and turns around, shoulders shuddering.

"Whoa, Whoa," Jim slides to his knees in from of his youngest child. "Why are you crying? Your sisters going to be find."

"It's my fault Maddy got hurt," Zoe sniffles. "If I had…" she trails off as tears stream down her cheeks.

"No, no." Jim shakes his head, cupping her cheeks and wiping away the tears with the pads of his thumbs. "Your sister does not blame you."

"But it's my fault. She got hurt protecting me."

"Maddy did what she had to because she loved you," Elisabeth says softly. "I would have done the same thing."

"I would have too," Josh says, ruffling Zoe's hair. "Couldn't let anything happen to my little sis."

Mark shifts in the background. For some reason, he feels that he shouldn't be here. This is a family affair. And he is not family.

Then there is a noise, and it is quite possibly the best thing any of them has ever heard.

A small sigh. That's all it is. But it is sweat music because before Mark can prepare himself, Maddy's eyes are opening and her fingers are twitching with consciousness.

"Do you guys mind," she whispers, though there is a smile spreading across her lips. "I'm trying to get some sleep."

"Maddy!" Zoe exclaims, shooting forward and wrapping her arms around her sister's neck.

"Nice to see you too," Maddy says, grimacing. "But broken ribs, Zo. You're gonna have to go easy on me."

Zoe pulls away, smiling sheepishly. "Sorry."

Maddy grins. "Don't worry about it. I'm glad to see you're okay."

Elisabeth leans forward and kisses her daughter on the forehead before she pulls up Maddy's data pad. Jim and Josh swoop in with smiles and light kisses.

"How do you feel?" The mother asks.

Maddy lies still for a moment. "Not good," she admits. "I can't remember," she scrunches her eyes up. "Much of anything, actually."

Elisabeth nods in understanding. "That would be the concussion."

"Yeah, no more hits to the head, sis." Josh smiles with masked relief. "It would be a shame to lose your brilliance. Imagine, after today you might actually be," he pauses and looks around, like he's about to tell her a secret and leans close, "_Normal_."

Maddy fakes a laugh. "I see the circumstances haven't taken away your humor," she says softly with a smile.

Mark chooses then to slip out the door, perfectly content with letting the Shannon family have their moment. He'll get to see Maddy later—

"Mark?" Jim Shannon has cut off his escape. The father shuts the clinic door softly behind him and turns to Mark with questioning eyes. "Where are you going?"

Out of reflex Mark's hands slip behind his back and he stands straighter. "You need to have time with her. She needs time with her family…"

Jim notices Mark's stance and flinches slightly. "Look, about before, I didn't mean to get angry at you."

Mark shakes his head, looking to the floor. "No, no. I understand—"

"No," Jim cuts him off. "No, _I_ didn't understand." He shakes his head and scratches the back of his neck. He opens his mouth like he's going to say something, thinks better, and then glances up, blue eyes shining. He motions to the space between Mark and the clinic door. "This thing that you have with my daughter. I didn't want to believe it at first. I mean, she's only sixteen, you're—" he pauses and scrunches his eyes up in thought. "Actually, how old are you?"

Before Mark can answer, Jim is cutting himself off, shaking his head. "Never mind. That doesn't matter. What _does_ matter are your feelings towards my daughter. And I was—well I didn't want to believe it. I mean, Maddy, she's my little girl—"

"And when she told you she might like me, you knew that it was the beginning of her growing up. That one day, she'd put you on the sidelines altogether." Mark finishes. He knows the feeling all too well.

Jim's questioning eyes make him smile. "I had a sister," Mark divulges to the surprise of Jim. "back in 2144. Let's see," he squints and thinks back, "she was about seven-eight when she first told me she had a crush on a boy at school. It was…"

"Surprising," Jim finishes. "And frightening as hell all at the same time. You'd never thought the day would come."

Mark nods. "Here she was, growing up right in front of me, and I hadn't even noticed."

Jim fixes him with this kind of scanning look. Like the father is trying to get over his parental urges and consider the feelings of his daughter. Finally, Jim sighs. "You have my permission to eventually," he points a non-threatening finger at Mark, "_eventually_ ask for my daughters hand in marriage. These past couple of hours have really put things into perspective for me, and I can't deny my daughter the first true good thing she's had in her life. So, this proposal will happen only after we, the Shannon family, are finally settled here at Terra Nova and you two have dated for at least two years. She'll be eighteen then, and however much it frightens me, be in complete control of her life." He pauses for emphasis. "Are we clear?"

Mark is too stunned to answer. So he numbly nods his head. Then his mouth opens and word vomit attempts to roll off his tongue. "Sir, I would—"

Jim smiles and slaps Marks arm, then places a firm hand on Mark's back and directs him towards the door to Maddy's room. "Yeah, I know Reynolds. I know."

Before they enter, Jim Shannon freezes, hand wrapped around the door handle.

Mark looks to the father and finds blue eyes staring right back at him.

"Thank you, Mark," Jim says seriously, "For saving me daughter's life."

But again, before Mark can reply, Jim is opening the door and declaring with a smile, "Look who I found sulking outside!"

Mark is pushes through the door and he swears he can't feel his hands because Maddy Shannon is smiling brilliantly at him, eyes shining.

He grins so wide he's surprised his cheeks don't hurt. And then Maddy is opening her right hand in a motion that tells him she wants to hold his hand. _Now_. Who is he to deny her what she wants?

Mark is at her bedside in an instant, swooping down and planting a kiss on her forehead. He places a hand against her cheek and can't stop smiling. "Hey."

Maddy smiles right back. "Hey."

In that moment nothing else mattered except that Maddy Shannon is alive and Mark Reynolds is at her side.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** So this chapter was originally going to be the end, but I figured there was so much angst in this that I needed to end on a happy note. So the next chapter is the last one, and full of Maddy/Mark fluff. You have been warned. Fluff like it's so adorable it's kind of nauseating. Until next time! Oh, and next time will probably be at the start of the new year. Sorry, but Christmas and New Years trumps writing for me. I wish it wasn't so, but my mother hates it when I hold up in my room and write all day.


	4. Maddy Shannon 2

**A/N:** So this is it. The last chapter. Thank you all so much for your support for this story and your loyalty. I know I am not the best updater haha. Oh, and for all of you _Hunger Games_ fans out there (which is my new _obsession_) see if you can find the references. I couldn't help myself :)

49 Days 'till the _Hunger Games_!

Also, there's a very active movement on twitter to get _Terra Nova_ renewed for a season 2. So, if you have a twitter make yourself known!

* * *

><p><em>She's so gone<em>

* * *

><p><em>Part Four:<em>

_Maddy Shannon (2)_

"_And then we'll dance 'till the morning light."_

* * *

><p>She's back under the ruble again.<p>

With the pain.

The helplessness.

The cold—_suffocating_—desperation.

Where time has no meaning.

Time.

Humans invest so much into the concept, and Maddy Shannon is no different. After all, didn't her old world just—_run out_ of it? She finds it slightly funny that she will soon have that in common with her ex-home.

Still, humans follow the hours—the minutes—the seconds—religiously. We adhere to our appointments; rely on the throbbing tick-tock of a clock to tell us that our life is moving (wasting away?). And we trust that time will always keep going. That one hour will follow the other—that tomorrow will follow today—that next week will follow this one.

(Tick tock goes the clock)

Because we would fall apart without it. Consistency makes humans productive and keeps us sane.

Maddy relies on the fact that this day will pass and has hopes that the next might be better. God does she hope it is better.

Because where she is right now is a nightmare. She does not know how long she's been buried, and when time has no meaning, it becomes the enemy.

And Maddy suddenly realizes that Death and Time are close friends. They exist within each other. They _are_ one another. Because every second (or what she considers a second) she spends in the ruble brings her that much closer to death.

Humans grow, age, and then die. But sometimes, time slices off in the middle, abruptly ending everything.

The complete and utter darkness she finds herself in makes it hard to breathe. She knows it probably has something to do with the crushing weight on her back. The freezing agony in her left side.

Her lungs are just so _damn_ _tired_. They stutter and struggle for air that is stale and old and dust filled.

And just when she thinks that this is it, that this time, the darkness is going to finally take her, there is a warmth that finds her. It starts at her cheek, like someone is stroking it affectionately, and slowly spreads through her body.

So instead of waking up with wide eyes, alone, in her dark bedroom, Maddy Shannon's eyes slide open and a calming sigh escapes her lips.

She's vaguely aware of Mark Reynold's thumb stroking her cheek and the heat of the sun on her face.

"You okay?"

She turns her head from his lap to look at him, takes in his slanted eyebrows and turned down lips, and nods with a reassuring smile. "Yeah."

He relaxes against the tree at his back, not fully convinced, but eyes scanning the meadow in front of him anyways.

The field they are in—their Day Flower field—is now a natural preserve for the plants. Maddy'd petitioned Taylor months ago to get a fence built around it so that she could study the flower without interruption.

They come here often now. Sometimes to do work. Sometimes to relax. Sometimes for other things.

His fingertips brush against the freshly healed scar at her hairline and his eyes cloud over.

Before, she'd get nervous just being around him. But now? Well, she can read him like an open book. The slight clench of his jaw. The way his lips press together to form a hard line. He's beating himself up about what happened to her.

Maddy sighs deeply, refuses to roll her eyes at him, and takes one of his hands into hers. She runs her fingers over the light scars that fleck the skin of his palm and then kisses them gently.

"We all have them, you know."

Her hand tightens around his and she turns her head away. She does not want to talk about them. Talking about them brings flashes from her nightmares. Short snippets that send chills down her spine. Fragments that threaten to throw her back under the ruble. Back into darkness.

"I see the first man I ever killed in mine."

The world freezes for a moment and all she can see is him. And she figures that this, the way he says the right thing or lets just the right amount of emotion slip, is why she loves him so much. Here he is telling her about his personal demons all to make her feel better. All to make her feel like she is not alone in this.

"Who was he?"

Mark shrugs. "I was really soldier gung-ho back in 2144. I was maybe—sixteen when I was first deployed." He pauses to lick his lips, eyes searching the horizon for some kind of answer. "We got pinned down somewhere outside of Iran." He swallows visibly and she wonders if he's hearing the bursts of gunfire and agony filled screams. "The guy came out of nowhere. We locked eyes for a moment, just a moment, and the next thing I knew he was on the ground with my bullet in his head."

He squeezes her hand almost like he's making sure she's there and he's not pinned down somewhere in the desert.

"And you want to know what was wrong? Killing him was easy. Pulling that trigger. It was the simplest thing I'd ever had to do." He frowns and searches the ground. "But the worst part was after. Because I started to think about who he was. Was he a father? Did he have a family? Was he going to be missed? And if he had reacted just a little bit sooner and shot me instead, would he be thinking the same thing? How would I be remembered? If at all?"

He shakes his head like he's aggravated at himself and licks his lips. Slowly, he turns her hands over in his, running his thumb delicately over her skin. "I can see his eyes." He smiles sadly. "They were a hazel color, like the brown and green were constantly battling for dominance. He had a scar," Mark touches his lip with a fingertip, "Right here. And I always wondered where he had gotten it."

Scratching his chest he turns his head away. "And the thing that upsets me the most is that I never knew his name." He shakes his head again. "It's stupid, I know."

"It's not stupid," she breaks her silence with a simple shake of her head. She doesn't look at him, just takes his hand and kisses it again. She knows he gets uncomfortable when people look at him when he talks. She figures it has something to do with his rank as a soldier. And she respects that. She understands that.

"I'm under the ruble again. Every night since it's happened." She fidgets with his fingers to keep her mind calm and voice from shaking. From the pain. The helplessness. "And it's just…"she stops to swallow the lump in her throat because she owes him this much. "…It's just that I'm completely alone. That I feel like I'm going to die alone."

He's very measured in his response. She figures that he once thought the same thing. That he was going to be buried in a foreign country beneath sand and blood that was nothing like home.

"You're never alone." He closes his fingers close around her hands and he learns forward to kiss her forehead gently. "I know that's easy for me to say, but it's the truth. You have your mom. Your dad. Your sister and brother. And me." He looks at her, eyes full of so much emotion and love that her heart almost stops. "You'll always have me."

This is why she loves him.

She grins up at him, hoping she's able to hide the blush in her cheeks. "You're incredible."

"Why thank you."He inclines his head and flashes one of his famous sideways grins. "You're not so bad yourself."

She laughs and there is a sudden, sharp pain shooting through her left side. Granted, it's been a while since the events of what the colony is calling Black Saturday, but the aftereffects are still felt. The colony is still rebuilding, and Maddy's side still kills her.

Mark's eyes sharpen ever so slightly and she curses the fact that she's so damn easy to read. "Are you alright?" His voice is composed, but Maddy can find the anger laced through his words.

She knows this anger. It's the same silent rage that her father has had in his eyes for the past three weeks. And Maddy gets it. She gets why they are upset. It's stupid and illogical, but the men of her life (well, most men, actually) seem to think that they should be able to control everything. That their masculinity and power should grant them some kind of respect from the universe.

But when they aren't able to prevent everything, much like the events of Black Saturday, they hate being reminded of their failures.

Examples:

The healed scar in her hairline that seems almost white against her tan skin. How it takes everything out of her just to get out of bed every morning. The grimaces that she tries to hide when she's forced to carry or push anything, because really, your triceps don't heal _that_ fast. How her hand travels to her left side unconsciously when it's ached to the point agony.

She sighs and grabs for his arm. He knows what that means.

Slowly, because it really almost kills her, Mark helps her sit up.

"Do we need to get you to your mom?"

She laughs at that. Because honestly, she's seen more of her mom in the past three weeks than she has her entire life. The nagging. The constant surveillance.

"That would be a negative, corporal. A hell no, actually." She smiles and kisses his cheek. "You can help me up, though. We should get back before my father kills you for keeping me OTG for so long."

Mark laughs and gets to his feet, rather easily for Maddy's taste, and then lifts her to her feet. "He's not going to kill me."

Maddy flashes him a teasing smile and makes her way towards the rover.

Mark's face drops. "He won't, right?" he calls after her. She turns and smiles at him over her shoulder, shrugging. "Hey, Maddy!" He jogs after her. "He won't, _right?_"

**.**

**.**

**.**

She doesn't really slide into bed anymore. It's more of like a fall. A collapse if you will. Like when you go to the gym and work your legs to much so when you have to go to the bathroom, you just kind of drop onto the seat.

Yeah, that's how Maddy Shannon get's into bed these days. It's not easy, but once she's in, she's in, because sitting or propping herself up isn't an option. And while Maddy was a firm sleep-on-your-side-or-stomach kind of girl, she's been forced to lay flat on her back.

And that's the worst part.

Having to stare up at her dark, vast, empty ceiling every night.

"You still up?" Elisabeth Shannon pokes her head into the room.

Maddy glances over to her mother and smiles. "Not for long."

The Shannon matriarch smiles at her and rests her cheek against the doorframe, eyes clouding over like they do when she's remembering Maddy's childhood memories. "How'd today go?" she finally asks, eyes scanning.

Maddy knows she won't be able to lie. Her mother's known her long enough to see through them. "It's getting batter. My arms don't ache as much. But my side—"

"—Still kills you." Elisabeth finishes, nodding. "I can tell. And it's understandable. The amount of trauma—"

"Mom," Maddy forces a smile. "Not now, okay? It's not the ideal conversation I want to have before I go to bed."

"You're right," Elisabeth leans back and looks out into the hallway, a soft smile finding her face. Maddy can't tell who she's looking at. "Anyways, your father and I might have found a way to cut back on your nightmares."

"My nightmares?" Maddy stammers. She never told them. "How did you know?"

Elisabeth lifts an eyebrow and smiles sadly. "Would you be surprised if I told you we slept outside your room the first couple of weeks? Just to make sure you were okay?"

Maddy returns the smile, feeling slightly guilty. Of course her parents would be worried about her. Why hadn't she considered it before?

"Don't give me that look," Elisabeth laughs. "We didn't want to worry you."

"Then what's this plan?" Maddy sighs, pressing her head into her soft pillow. "Dream therapy?"

Her mother flashes this sideways grin. "Kind of." She takes a step away from the doorframe and motions with her hand for someone to step forward.

And then Mark Reynolds is standing in her doorway with a duffle bag slung over his shoulder. He smiles sheepishly at her and enters the room.

Maddy doesn't have time to think about it. Suddenly her arms are underneath her and she's pushing herself into a sitting position. Then the pain slams into her like a freight train and she closes her eyes and clenches her jaw to keep from crying out.

"You don't need to get up on my account." Mark is by her side in seconds, easing her back down into her pillow.

"What?—How?—Why?" She swallows and looks from him to her mother. "_What?_"

Elisabeth steps into the room. "Mark came and talked to us today when you were out shopping with Zoe in the market. He told us about the nightmares that we already knew about and the reasons why he thought you were having them." She shrugs. "Then it was a simple decision."

"But Dad—" she stammers.

"It was your father's idea, actually," Mark smiles, and then leans closer to her so only she can hear him. "And he did not want to kill me, in case you were wondering."

She still doesn't know what to say. "I'm sorry. I don't understand." She looks to Mark. "Why are you here, again?"

"I'm sleeping over." He tilts his head. "Isn't it obvious?"

Maddy's shock reflects in her dropped jaw and wide eyes. She looks past Mark's shoulder to her mother, but Elisabeth just shrugs and smiles.

"Goodnight, Maddy," she says. Turning to leave, she stops and places a hand on the doorframe. "And Mark?" She looks at the boy from over her shoulder. "I trust you'll take care of her?"

Mark nods. "Of course, Mrs. Shannon."

And then Elisabeth is gone and Mark is shutting the door quietly. He pauses at the door, hand resting against the wood. She watches his shoulders raise and drop with a heavy sigh. Slowly he turns to her. "So," he says. "There room for me in there?"

She manages to close her mouth and nod her head all at the same time. "Absolutely."

He smiles and turns off the light. Slowly, so as not to hurt her, he eases himself next to her in the bed and pulls the covers over them. They lay in silence for a moment before she finally turns her head to him.

"How in the hell did you pull this off?"

He turns and shrugs at her, face straight, like it was the simplest thing on the planet to get her father to agree to let him stay the night with her. "I told them that you were afraid to be alone."

"And that worked?" she asks him skeptically.

"You'd be surprised," he answers. "They were extremely worried about you and thought I could help"

She sighs and finds Marks hand. She interlaces their fingers and lifts her head. He slips his arm under her neck and she lies back against his bicep and turns her face into his chest. "You'll stay, right?" She mumbles, because she suddenly exhausted.

"Of course," he murmurs in her ear, kissing her forehead.

Just before sleep takes her, she feels mark tighten his hold around her and whisper, "I love you, Maddy Shannon." He kisses her head again. "Always."

It is his presence that keeps the nightmares away. The security she feels in his arms. The safety. It calms her and for the first time in weeks she actually sleeps without interruption.

And Maddy dreams of Mark and realizes she'll never be alone.


End file.
